OK where to start. First I'd like to start by saying I have never actually asked for money this way before so I hope my message comes across ok.
I have lived my life under the constent cloud of depression, the reason for this I firmly believe is due to the fact I was raised as a Jehovah's Witness. I am now 43 and have absolutely no qualifications or work skills to fall upon. This was in direct view of the cult teachings of never seeking further education as our time would be spent more wisely serving what we thought was god. It turnes out this was nothing more than a lie.
I lived under the constent fear of being distroyed by god, there were days I would hear a low flying plane and I would absolutly shit myself thinking armageddon has arrived! Totally irrational I know but when your under the mind control of a cult you believe everything you are being told. (example - Jonestown) I have even had nightmares armageddon arrived and I wasn't ready. All this along with a very unstable family setting has took it's toll on my mental health. I not only have depression, I also suffer terrible anxiety and PTSD! Yes, PTSD is not just reserved for militery personel, there are studies regarding the severe trauma a cult surviver is left with long after leaving the cult.
So why have I chose the Philipines? It's simply because it hasn't lost its tredition, the people are very friendly and I need to move away from the western world to move on with my life and start again. As I said, I am now 43, and although I do not have any skills I consider myself an empath, I absorb the environment around me and I just want to be happy, I actually have no idea how personal happiness feels as I was always told in order to be happy you had to work for the watchtower cult!
Anyway, I hope this sounds ok and I'm sorry if it sounded rather gloomy. Having said that, If I indeed reach my target I will definitely update you all.