Help These Women Get Married

Vuvu and I fell in love in July of 2010, but we had to hide our love for one another due to societal prejudices and no support from our families. People assumed that we were just friends for the longest time, but our love is so powerful, it could not be ignored. Our close friends were the first to notice something bigger was going on and when we broke the news to them, they encouraged us to be free about our love - which was much easier said than done. In 2013, we came out to our families who had already grown to love Vuvu and I, although they had no idea that we were in a relationship. We expressed to them that we would like to get married and at first, they did not take it too well. Once they realised that we were not going to give up on each other, they agreed to give us their blessing as long as we followed South African Xhosa traditional customs which state that when a daughter gets married, her spouse is to pay a dowry (which we call **"lobola") for her to be handed over. Since we are both girls, both families are insisting on this dowry payment, which MEN are usually prepared for, but we believe that our families have thrown this ultimatum in as a curve ball, knowing full-well that we are both not in a financial position to do that. Our families are very important to both of us and having their blessing would mean the world to us. The dowries have been set at 20 cows each - amounting to a monetary value of approximately $6500 each. We'd like to appeal to the world to save our love - save our lives - by helping us be together AND win our families over. We'd love to have a beautiful wedding, with beautiful gowns and a venue, where two women can be together and celebrate our love freely, but we'd just be happy to pay our dowries and have a simple wedding in court. Please help us. **lobola: Please make an effort to Google what lobola is about. It is not about the money or attaching any worth to the bride, but rather a traditional custom put in place to unite the families and bless the marriage taking place. In our culture, the belief is that to evade this process would result in our marriage being cursed by our ancestors. That is why this is so important to us.