Help Me Go Home

Hi.

My name is Robin. I am 51 years old, mom of three and grandmother to 7.

I have thought of what I would write, trying to get it just right.. but I just can't. This is what my project is for.. plain and simple, no manipulation.. just truth..

I lived in Tucson Arizona with my adult children around me.... I was very blessed.

About 6 years ago, I was diagnosed with Valley Fever,  (Coccidioidomycosis) . I was first told I had lung cancer, then after the diagnosis, told that it was so advanced that my lung would eventually have to be removed. I had NO insurance.  I became very ill.. anti-fungal medicines that acted like chemo and were very expensive,  incredible fatigue and constant pain. I lost my job, my home and my car because I couldn't work.  Over the next few years, I did minimum wage jobs, tried to keep my head above water .. it didn't work.  I ended up having to give up and come home to this small town in Minnesota to where my family was, leaving my kids behind.  My family cannot help.... Since then I have been struggling here, working full time at a job I hate just to TRY and keep living. I am so so so very tired.  I have decided to survive, pray and leave my sickness to Jesus.. I can't afford the treatment, or the medicine.  There is no cure for this disease.. except for Him.. Right now, today, I can feel it getting worse. I am so afraid that it may have gone into my spine or other parts of my body. I just want to go home...

It has been almost three years since I have seen my children. My oldest boy has two beautiful girls that I have never seen or held. My middle boy with 4 babies, needs me near him.  My youngest, my daughter, tries to keep the phone calls coming from my grandson so he remembers his Nana...  I cry every night when I pray. 

My heart is breaking. I am so far behind in my bills.. I am taking advances on my paycheck. I just seem to get further and further behind. I wanted so much to save enough to be able to go home and see my grandbabies, but I see no hope for that.  My prayer is that somehow, I can raise enough money to get on top of my monthly bills, pay my rent ahead and be able to go see my children and my grandchildren for a couple of weeks.

I know it seems selfish for me to be asking for help.  There are so many people who need so much more... But I just don't know what else to do.  I have always been that person who reaches out and gives, even when I have nothing.. It is my hope that someone will be able to do it for me now....

The ONLY thing I want is to see my babies.  I can handle just about anything else that life throws at me... But I CAN'T handle not being able to see my children... It is killing me.. . Please.... As I am writing this, I am praying over the words on the screen.  Please let this work.  Please help me go home... Please? 

P.S. a 100 donation goal will help me go live on this site, allow others to see me... It will open doors.... Please..Please help me... 

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Valley Fever Survivor