I am writing to ask for your financial support for a very special goal – to help me improve my life and become a better, more stable individual so that I can be the best mom that I can for my unborn first child, Sophia-Marie.
In March of 2010, when everyone else around my age was gearing up for the end of the Spring semester at college, I had a nervous breakdown. I began my college career at eighteen, immediately upon graduating high school, like most believe you’re generally supposed to. I believed that it was the right move for me, as well, but I was wrong.
Not too long before beginning my first semester as a college student, I had undergone an extremely traumatic event, one that is still too disquieting for me to discuss with others. However, I thought I was over it, thought I was stronger, and I pushed through and aced my classes that first quarter. The same happened my second year of college, as I quietly pushed through bouts of depression and frustration in secret and alone. I knew things were taking a turn for the worst, though, when my grades began to slip dramatically and days would go by that I wouldn’t even get out of bed. I tried speaking to professors, one-on-one. But how much concern could they really express for one troubled student with personal issues, out of hundreds of others?
Along with college, I was also holding down a part-time job doing what I love, working with children as a kindergarten group leader at an afterschool program. This was one of the things that helped to keep me sane and grounded, because with kids, you have no choice but to be levelheaded, kind and patient. But this stability started to slip through my fingers, as well, as my grip on my sanity was steadily declining.
Losing my job would mean losing my babies and loading my work responsibilities onto someone else. Besides, without an income, and a place to go to take my mind off my issues, I would never have been able to stay in school. Unfortunately, staying in school was no longer an option, as my grades had slipped tremendously, with my GPA beyond repair. So, I did the only thing I could at that point, and withdrew from classes that March.
With my own time and space, without the added stress of classes, I began to regroup and come back to myself. In the past two years, I have grown, become stronger, and I finally feel ready to continue and complete my college education without allowing excess baggage to bring me down. I'm stronger in my faith and for the first time in a long while, I am actually happy to be alive and have realized how blessed I am just to exist in this place in time.
Not only am I grateful for my life, I am extremely happy that in the next three months, I will be bringing a brand new life into the world. I want to be someone my little girl can be proud to call mommy. Someone she can look to for dignity, advice, support and most importantly, strength.
I would have graduated by now. But people can only work at their own pace, in their own time, with the hand that they are dealt. Continuing my education is integral to being the person and most importantly, the mother that I want and need to be. As it currently stands, I owe my school over $3,000, which I cannot afford, as I lost my former job as a counselor once upper management had changed.
Once I pay my school, I can return and finish my education, paving the way to financially supporting my child and myself. I currently reside with two of my sisters, my mom, and my nephew. This is a living situation that is uncomfortable and unfit for a newborn baby who will have no place to sleep. The reality of shelter living is a hard pill to swallow and one I hope I never have to face. My family helps each other as much as we can, but we are all struggling to make ends meet and better our lives.
If it is in your heart to help me to improve my life and that of my child, may you be blessed and know that I would be forever grateful. No amount is too small, not even a penny. Even if you give no pennies and just say a prayer for us, just know that someone is always watching, listening and no good deed goes unnoticed. I do not know you, but I love you and appreciate you because I am alive and made it through this tumultuous journey that is life, thus far, amidst the pain and frustration and continue to smile and rejoice in life, and will continue to strive to be better every day that I am blessed with air in my lungs.