Fighting for my babies

Ok, so here is the deal. I lost custody of my two baby girls on January 17th, 2013. I never should have lost my babies in the first place. No one understands how it happened, and I mean no one. So, here is the story.

My ex and I were not together for very long, but in the process we had two girls. My oldest was born  in June 2009, and I eneded up get pregnant again in September. We then split up in October because his video game (WOW) was so much more important than my baby and I. Well, he ended up suing me for joint custody. At the time we had my oldest an equal amount of time, and I did not have the money for an attorney, so I agreed to the terms of no child support and joint custody. Well, in April 2010 my youngest was born. She was born 6 weeks prematurely and with multiple medical issues - deaf, sleep apnea, encephalocele (brain tissue that leaks out of the skull), and she would quit breathing when she ate. Well, needless to say the sleep apnea and breathing/eating things solved themselves as she got older. She was in the hospital for 2 weeks after her birth. Her father came to the hospital when he found out I went into labor, but left 5 min later. He was not there for her birth and during those two weeks he had only been to the hospital one time to see her. The first and last time he had been to a doctors appointment was when she turned a month old for her one month check up. She failed 14 hearing tests while in the hospital those two weeks, I had to take her to another town for a more extensive hearing test, which again he did not attend. I was then sent to even another town, OKC, for more testing. Where it came the outcome that she would beed hearing aides, we did the hearing aides, she was still unable to hear, her father was still not there. So, I went to another speacialest for her encephalocele, which he did not attend and they said it was not getting any larger so we really had no worries. Well, when it came to her hearing, the doctors and I made the decision that she would benefit from cochlear implants, so when she turned one years old set the dates for her surgeries, but before we could do that we had to get the encephalocele removed first. Again, her father was not present for any of this. He informed me, "she was deaf, God made her that way, and that is how she should say," my response to this was "God gave us the knowledge to fix it, so we fix it." So that is what I did. So, after 3 worrisome surgeries (that he never attended) she can hear and has a better quality of life, and that is all because of the decisions I made as a loving and caring mother. Well, as time moved on, he no longer had the girls equal time. He changed his jobs and hours so many times, and moved to other towns for his girlfriends, that I decided to file for full custody and child support in October 2012. This was an ongoing batter for almost a year. He accused my step son and my husband of sexual abuse on my oldest so he kidnapped my kids in July of 2013 and I had to get a court order in order to get my babies back. I was investigated my DHS and there was no findings what so ever, he was just trying to to pull anything and everything he could to make me look like a bad mom. But it didn't work. He was then ordered to start paying child support in October of 2013, with no back child support from when I requested it. Then we went to court again in January of 2014, he had multiple witnesses who went to the stand. One being my youngest speech therapist from the school district. She was also friends with my ex prior to this. She told the judge that I was harrasing her at work and caused her to quit her job and that she had been seeing my baby for over a year. Here is the kicker to it all, she had only been seeing my baby girl since April 2013, and the school board contacted me to inform me she would be taken off my daughters case in November of 2013 and she did not quit her job until December 2013. I have the proof that she lied on the stand. The judge did not care about any of it. The judge's wife is a teacher and had a soft spot for the witness. He said that because I caused a teacher to quit her job, he was giving my kids to my ex, who had NEVER asked for full custody until December 2013. I need to keep fighting for my babies, and my attorney is at a stand still for two reasons - number 1, I owe him money, and number 2 they havent filed the papers yet, and then once they do, he will want more money to keep the fight going, and then he knows the judge is going to deny the appeal already, so then I will have to file an appeal with the supreme court, which again costs more money. I need lots of help, and am finding it really hard to get it. I do work and barely make by on my own bills, my husband and I have full custody of his 3 kids as well, so its not like I have a lot of money, but I have raised my babies from the day they were born and I never should have lost them in the first place. The moment he gets custody of my babies and after 4 years of no help from him, I am ordered to pay him child support. Things just dont make sense in this case. I am working on filing a judicial complaint against the judge, but I will still need to contine to fight for my kids until they are back with me, where they belong. Thank you to anyone and everyone who can help me.