Ayla was a happy, healthy little baby. Always smiling, always content and loved beyond belief by everybody. That's what makes it all the more senseless that she was taken from us at just 4 and a half months old.
No warning... No answers... she was just gone.
There is nothing on earth that can prepare you for the depth of pain and level of grief that losing your child will cause you. NOTHING. Every minute of every day is a struggle. I have come to realise that the biggest thing getting you through every day is support. I'm lucky, I have amazing family and friends who are always there for me, no questions asked, no matter what. But sometimes, they are just not enough. They don't KNOW what its like. For a lot of people - myself included - the support provided by organisations dealing specifically with this kind of grief is life-saving. They KNOW. They have experienced it themselves. And I cant begin to tell you what a difference that makes.
So, in honour of little Ayla and to mark Baby Loss Awareness Day on 15th October, myself and my sister will be walking the West Highland Way to raise money for two charities - Forget-Me-Not Counselling and SANDS (Stillbirth and Neonatal Death). Both these charities have provided me with support and I want to be able to give back to them, to allow them to go on to help other people who find themselves in this horrible, horrible situation.
But most of all, we are doing it to give some meaning to little Ayla's short time with us and to try to have some good come out of this horrendous mess.
PAYING IT FORWARD!!
love Elaine and Jacquelyn xx