My last date with the love of my life

Hello guys,

My name is Nino and this is the story of the love of my life Thaisha.

Before we go into all of it, I just want to start with a brief introduction of my family. My family, Thaisha and I and 3 children (Jellianne (12) Tyrone (10), Archer (9)) Live a very simple life in the Zambales, Philippines. I work for, in my opinion, the best company in the world and Thaisha stays at home to help with the kids and the house. We are happy and we never asked for anything else than to be able to eat 3 times a day and celebrate life to what we can do. We live in a house where there are 2 rooms but because we got used to sleeping in one room, we stayed in that room. All 5 of us.

One night, while the kids were playing outside and I was on my station, I noticed that she's having a little trouble breathing. More trouble than usual. She has Asthma you see, and she's had it since she was a child. I decided to rush her to the hospital and with the help with my mom in law, we tried bringing her through the stairwell.

She was able to get to the stairwell but after 1 flight, she stops and says "I can't breathe anymore. I'm sorry" to her mom while I was running to get my motorcycle (with sidecar) to use to bring her there. She passed out and she was limp like she's lost all control of her body. Thankfully, we had our neighbor bring a bigger motorcycle that they use to deliver vegetables and decided to help.

The hospital was about 10 minutes away from our place and with a motorcycle, we can push it to get there in less. I drove my motorbike while Thaisha was in the vegetable delivery motorcycle, still unconscious, fighting for her life. Struggling to breathe. I can only imagine what she was feeling at the time and it breaks my heart every time I try.

We get to the hospital, to the emergency room and we got her on the emergency room bed. You can see her face, all pale and her lips already black. She's lost most of the oxygen in her body and seeing her like that, I wanted to break down and cry. I couldn't because I have to be strong. I had to be there to give her any type of help if she needs it. The thought of losing break started to seep in and my world started crumbling. She needed to be revived because her heart stopped beating on the Emergency Room bed. They were able to revive her by giving her meds to jump start her heart again. She became stable but her brain wasn't functioning as she wasn't responding to any pain tests at all. After a couple of hours of being stable, her vitals starting to falling again while I was with her in the room. I was pushed out by the staff and was asked "Should we continue to revive her?" confirming my suspicions.

I didn't want to accept it at first but after this day, I realized, that was when she left us.

I left the hospital a broken man and In the back of my mind, I know I've lost the love of my life. My brain started thinking of a lot of things, one of them was to also follow her because I've lost the only thing I had to live for. My time of weakness and selfishness was washed away by my daughter's question "Daddy, when is mommy coming home?" right after that question, all the tears that I've been holding back through out the years just rushed out like a faucet with a broken handle. I cried for a while then she said "Stop crying daddy, everything is going to be alright." Then I stopped, thought about my kids, and I wanted to hit myself. I didn't lose my reason to live for, but I now have a lot more reason to live. I have 3 wonderful kids to protect and make strong. I know that I'm the only one to do it as my wife would have wanted. Life moves on.

The following days were a blur of doctors, nurses, visits and such. She was diagnosed with Cerebral Hypoxia, as her brain no longer responds to any type of stimulus. Her organs started failing and It further killed the hope of seeing her smile again. The only thing that's keeping her alive were the machines and the drugs that are being fed through endless tubes that I know will haunt me and my family for the rest of our lives.

Crying became the norm to me and my emotions kept me awake and told me to "MOVE" as I should, according to the situation. My brother Pongz help kept me sane, my brother's wife Jaja helped me with so many things and my whole family huddled around me to protect me. Mostly from stupid thoughts. They helped immensely by telling me to keep strong, which I slowly did.

After 4 days of medication, after the doctors non stop asking me the question "Should we continue?" I convinced my mother in law to stop her from suffering. Before doing so, I talked to the doctor and tried to confirm to him the situation and he agreed. He already had suspicions of how bad the damage was since the first time she saw her in the emergency room. He gave us the option to take her home and let her pass there, or we can remove the meds and machines to slowly allow her to succumb to her condition. Which we chose after a debate. It was a sad day for everyone, it was the day that my world just imploded on itself.

Today, as of 8:46 in the morning, her suffering finally ended and I was there to say goodbye to her. Gave her my last kiss goodbye and assured her that my children will have a bright future with me. My last date with the love of my life had ended....

The reason why I'm asking for your help is I want to be able to give her a good funeral and allow me to bury her. The hospital bills are up to 10,000 dollars now and they won't allow me to retrieve her body to get her ready for the wake. As a simple man like me, this is an impossible amount to reach. My family has pitched in for the meds and everything else however, we're still very much far away from getting her out of the hospital. All I can do is ask for anyone who's willing to pitch in. Anyone who's been touched by our story and any good Samaritan that would help us with this heavy burden. I would be truly thankful for anyone that's willing to help. Thank you everyone and thank you for reading and praying for my wife.

Regards,
Nino Balingit