I’m so tired of the fake lives that we are surrounded !!! Help me, please

Hi and thank you! My vision of the world was changed over a long time, especially when I had filled the blank in some of my concerns. I'm minimalist, and I'm happy to live at my own pace, I decided to buy and convert a van to a camper, and this is my story.

I'm diabetes since 2010 and I'm 32 years right now, I inject 5 times a day the insulin, 2 times morning, 2 times night, and 1-time lunch the illness took me more than 10 years from my life, it's ok because I learned a lot from it, to put all in the big picture my life was super tough, I was at the point to finish my life "suicide" many times" I'm not the only one, I know, there are a lot of people there lives were like their lives in hell, that is so sad to me ", but I swear I enjoy right now what happened to me, because my philosophy is so simple, if all the events and experiences haven't happened to me I will not become what I'm now.

So, some of you can have the question, what is the button that starts my feeling of quitting living inside the society? One thing I was to be super crystal clear from my childhood I hate fake lives and social media.

So the answer, first I was diagnosed as INTJ personality, just put that in consideration, this is the start of answering the question. I will talk about my society, I was in harmony a couple of years before raising the big questions about our life and it comes obsessions like what is happiness? what is life? why we do what we do in predefined order? etc

Even those questions seem simple but for me took time to answer those deep topics, after that, I said wait! everyone has his dream, happiness, the meaning of life, and most importantly we are differently wired.

After a bunch of nights without sleeping and endless hours of thinking deeply, seriously I was fighting so hard against my thoughts, but I can't resist that feeling, the voice inside me said the life is an adventure, nature, exploration, sooner or later you will quit! I think the moment comes.

So what about my finance? I'm a contents/articles writer freelancer at the moment, I learned " Global Macro Trading " and " Quantitative trading " I don't start yet to be a full-time trader, my freelancing job just keep me in life I couldn't afford to buy a van and conversion it, and that why I want you to help me to achieve my dream, I believe every drop has his impact so please if you feel that you can help me, be sure that you will change my life to the better.

Thanks again to help me to achieve my dream. Much love!