The new me needs you.

I know first thing you are thinking really ask money for cosmetic surgery, but wait, please hear my story before you close the window because it truly is something life changing for me. I am a mother of 5 ages 4-21. Three c-sections due to major complications and I am so very fortunate to have the children I do. One of my daughters is disabled due to her being born so early from complications. She has needed over 50 surgeries in her life from hip to brain. My entire focus has been her and now she is 20 years old and finally thriving living on her own. Somewhere along the last 15 years I lost myself. My dedication to my children and their health caused me to forget to take care of me or maybe neglect myself just due to plain depression of my circumstances. A year ago I made a decision to change it. I was 262 pounds with a newly diagnosed thyroid condition which of course makes it that much harder to lose any weight at all. I felt like you could paint me green and call me Fiona from Shrek. Now I know this is obviously an exaggeration but if you have ever struggled with something regardless what it is you should understand. This was determination for me emotionaly, physically, and mentally. I started losing here and there each week but in my mind when seeing myself in the mirror, I didn't see anything. Some people would say you look different but couldn't quite put their finger on why. Then more weight came off as I continued my journey. Finally, I was at the 100 lb marker. I had lost 100 lb but still my mental state was not seeing it. First, I had to go to a conference for my work. There people were saying hello to everyone as we all work together on some type of regular basis. When I approached someone and asked them jokingly if they were going to say hello, they looked at me very strange and said "do I know you?" That was my first moment where I thought hmmmm do I look that different? My director said well I think we need an updated picture of you for your ID now... I thought well I think thats going too far but ok. When they were told who I was their mouths dropped...once again I was like really??? I still see the same person. Later, I went on my very first float trip in my life! There I saw some friends I hadn't seen in several months. Anna came up to me and said OH MY GOSH!! you have lost so much weight I didn't even know who you were and look I can see your collar bones! Now, this sounds silly, frivolous and crazy but her comment I can see your collar bones was the key for me. Pandoras box was opened and I could finally see what I had and how I had changed into. I can now feel better about who I am for the most part. Currently, I am struggling with the remaining weight mostly due to my thyroid irregularity and managing time for work out session with my jobs and my children. However, my biggest obstacle is self image. It is the true age old story of you shouldn't do this. You are beautiful the way you are. I must tell you unless you feel it, it doesn't matter. So, after 5 children and 3 c-sections I have a tummy I cannot get rid of and after breast feeding all five of my children my breasts sag and are depressing to say the least. I would like you to consider donating to my cause of getting a tummy tuck and a breast lift so I can finish my journey and feel/become the woman I feel inside. Why? This might be the question you have. When a person feels a specific way about themselves its difficult to listen to the positive, humans have an easier time believing the negative more than the positive. Also, if you feel better about yourself this in turns allow you to care more about yourself, work harder for your life and your children. I dont' believe this type of journey is for everyone. Mine isn't for conceited reasons but reasons for self fulfillment of a life long journey of being obese and always focusing on others rather than myself. Though my life is still dedicated to my children I have allowed myself to focus a bit more than I used to which has gotten me to where I am now. Just look at my before and after pictures, from what I am told you will be shocked. Please feel free to ask me anything as I am an open book to all who want to know more and how I feel this is part of my life journey. All my best to you and yours, Taci Mathers