About me, 11-years ago. Nobody enjoys the story of how they went bankrupt. I know I don’t. And let’s be honest, the risk of telling it generally outweighs the reward. Many people may not understand what you went through. Or they may simply think less of you… forever.
I’ve told very few my bankruptcy story because I was so embarrassed about it. Now I’m far more comfortable with it because it was so long ago; I don’t even feel like the same person.
I was 23-years old, living in Kuching in year 2007 and I am the only son in family. Yes, a 23-year old should probably completed or graduate from university but I’m I didn’t. I have started working a bit earlier because of financial difficulties to my family business. At such situations, my father and I decided to take whatever loans from financial institutions and trying to recover our family’s business. Unfortunately, our hard-work getting loans turn into disaster and efforts to rescue our family’s business is not successful. I get caught into a big financial crisis and since then my life changed. Everyday not a new day for me, and even not dare to wake up every morning. I’m been chased everyday by debtors and debt collectors. My life was terribly wrong at that time. Within a year I been sued bankrupt. And same as my father also been sued bankrupt by the financial institution.
The first thing I remember feeling after being sued bankruptcy was emotional relief. I could sleep again, and I was no longer worried about my debts. But that feeling didn’t last long. It was replaced by feeling “dirty”, like a societal black sheep. I didn’t feel proud that I’d played the system to my advantage. I felt guilty for welching on my debts and ashamed for getting myself in such a place to begin with.
And that feeling seeing your credit score plummet that first time you check it, realizing you have a long road ahead… it’s quite sobering.
11-years passing, I’m still living as a bankruptcy, but the only different is my father had passed away last year. I’m now having 3 kids, but still working hard trying to get rid of my debts. People who ever encounters then will know why I JUST WANT A SECOND CHANCE. I don’t want my kids to has a bankruptcy’s father. I’m tired and I don’t even think to live longer for such life Please help me!