Hello, I'm a stranger to all of you, but like everyone I have passion and a dream I want to live on. Sadly it's not possible because the one thing I love to do, which is to draw, I can't because just holding a pencil or pen now is difficult. I've been drawing since I was 8 years old and haven't stopped since. By the time I got to highschool I just knew that I want to make aliving out of doing what I love. But now I'm afraid it won't happen and as me and my family are constantly going through difficult times.
A couple of years ago, a nerve got pinched inside of my left arm, at first I didn't notice or know until I realized I could barely feel my pinky and ring finger. They were almost numb and I realized my elbow would hurt if there is any pressure. I researched because I didn't want to have to burden my family with more medical expenses and read how it should get better within time, but it didn't and now there's pain as well along with swelling that happens often. What didn't help is the fact my right hand, my main working hand, along with the entire arm suffered as well. Last year, I entered training for a company which I passed for during the application process, at the same time I was juggling it with my full-time freelance job. I was funding myself for this as my mom had been laid off just months before. I was covering my own transporation and food expenses while paying the bills.
Then my mom had an accident that left her with a second-degree burn all over her entire left hand. I had to leave the company for her sake as she couldn't be left alone being handicapped like that. So I became full-time freelance to pay the medical bills, cover all the other expenses while nursing her and it took three months before her hand healed.
I had been working 20 hours a day. I left the company due to health reasons, became full-time freelancer and I was still working over 10 hours a day as I was the only one who could earn to cover our bills and expenses. I have been avoiding the need to go to a hospital due to the lack of funds, but now I am desperately in need of proper treatment and possible surgery for both hands. Left hand: to treat the pinched nerve. Right hand: to properly have it checked for carpal tunnel and have it treated. I only managed to buy one hand/wrist brace and I have to wear it almost everyday, alternating between both hands. During the same year, I've endured a fractured ankle that hasn't healed properly so I can't run, much less walk for too long, and another pinched nerve around my hip area.
I honestly am jobhunting as while I'm still young it's so difficult when both my arms are basically injured. I often undergo so much pain, it's reached up to my shoulders due to lack of treatment. I've avoided the need to go to the hospital long enough and at this rate, I fear I can never draw again. I want to draw, I want to make a living out of it, but I can't because I'm in pain. I want to be able to work with a proper job to gain stable income not just to keep supporting myself and my mom, but also to pay off bills. I've already begun selling my own belongings and we still just barely, barely get by.
I'm sorry for asking for help like this.