I am 29 years old and last several years since gambling started slowly taking over my life have been unbareble and it has been only getting worse as I have only been increasing my debt, by gambling away thousands of euros..
Every time I have managed to pay something back I have turned to gambling again, at this point or to be honest at least for the past 3-4 years it has not been about the fun but desperate tries to get a big win to pay off my debts.
Sometimes it worked, I managed to win a little bit to pay something off, but I always end up at the same spot I gamble away again more money and even more than previously as I am not seeing any way out but to win.
During these times I have been having a suicidal thoughts, almost every time actually when i have dug the whole of debt even deeper as it seems immpossible to get out.
Been always thinking how great would my life be if I would not be at this spot. Everything else has been going well in my life and almost nobody could even tell what I am going through. Professional career has also been going well which is the reason why banks have had no issues giving me loans as I have been always paying off every single monthly payment even if it had to mean that I would have to go with barely any food for the whole month.
And during this pandemic it has only gotten worse as pretty much I have been staying indoors, just working and not caring about myself, that includes gabmling even more and making the situation much worse.
So far I have done everything I can to stop gambling but it might be too late already as all my monthly payments for the loans are already exceeding what I can earn in a month and probably not too late untill all the threat mail,calls start coming in as I won't be able to pay everything off.
If there are people who can help me, even a little bit, it would be a blessing. I understand that this possibly is not even that much money for a lot of people but it would be a lofe changer for me.
Thank you all for reading and hopefully this story will also stop someone from gambling - just don't start gambling, even if you think it's just for fun.