money for food

Hello! My name is Dmitry, I from Russia. Unfortunately, I got into a difficult life situation, and at present I have nobody to count any more because I have neither relatives, nor friends. therefore I decided to write to you.

2016 just became the beginning of the end.

At first the bank in which there were means of my company was ruined, and I was left without money, then my aunt was oncology (cervical cancer) seriously ill, then I had to give not enough to time to the business (retail trade) to spend with her more time and together with my mother to look after mine the seriously ill patient the aunt.

In August, 2016 my aunt died. ☹ but 2017 became even worse: in February my favourite mummy (heart failure) died. So I lost the only relatives: mother and aunt. I was suppressed and broken, I didn't want to live, wanted will make a suicide …. There was most awful time in my life …

Are meanwhile long because of ruin of business and loss of savings (I looked after the aunt, then I was near mother: to her it was very heavy after the aunt's death, and then I was broken by the death of mother and was on treatment, accepted antidepressants and tried to begin to live anew) have an effect: debts grew, they needed to be repaid … in the spring of 2018 it was necessary to sell the apartment in the downtown (50 square meters) and to go to the outskirts to the apartment of 27 square meters, means from sale of the apartment allowed to repay partially the debts, there was only a small part of debts …

At present at me any money absolutely ended, I can't will find a job (don't hire anywhere), and I stay at home more than two months, just because I have no warm winter clothes which I have nothing to buy: money was enough only for food (a package of instant noodles and roll of bread), now money came to an end absolutely … ☹

I have no relatives. There were only my closest people: my mummy and my aunt. When problems began, all acquaintances and friends (if it was possible to call them friends) turned away from me. More I with anybody didn't communicate. Will address to me there is nobody.

Probably, you will tell that it is necessary to go to work. Truly. I agree. But to go to work it is necessary to leave the house and to go to interviews, and we have a winter, a frost. I just have no warm clothes and there is no money for journey. Yes, and the most important, isn't present money for food, even on bread. Absolutely. ☹ the last month 300 rubles (4.30 dollars) for 2 weeks were enough for me, it is bread (bread roll for two days) and a pack of instant noodles.

I have nobody to count here at all. Various charitable organizations at us help only children who seriously ill patients, or to large families. Just like that nobody will help the ordinary adult man with my country: I have housing, and I am rather healthy, not the disabled person (but recently the strong weakness and is turned the head, probably, all this because of food because I drink one water or tea).Just like that, posting online requests for the help at us nobody will help because, first, at us everyone for themselves, and secondly, think that I am a swindler and don't trust. And besides, to the small sick child of sympathy and compassion at our people much more, than to the adult. To the ordinary adult who temporarily got into a difficult situation to the aid in my country to count, it isn't necessary. At us help with the basic to seriously ill patients to children, or orphan children, disabled children. Even it is heavy to adult disabled person to receive the help. And to the ordinary ordinary person who temporarily got into a difficult life situation – and the more so. Nobody will help. Unless friends or relatives. But it developed so that I have no relatives and friends.

What should I do? Even more often from hopelessness I thought of a suicide again, now I understand that in it there is no need because I will die just of hunger as I have nothing to buy even the cheapest bread (it costs 20 rubles – 0.29 dollars) and instant noodles (costs 6 rubles – 0.09 dollars). On one water or tea I won't stretch … as option, still I can give the apartment as a deposit, but, banks won't give the credit to me because I spoiled credit history, and only various natural persons, and at us can give, these are generally swindlers who thus take away from people of the apartment. I can agree with them, but there is a risk to lose the apartment both to remain on the street and to be the homeless. Then it is more best most to die … And from where I will be able to pay huge interest under which at us issue such loans …: (If to go for building to earn additionally, then besides, right now it is not an exit: it is necessary to eat, first, normally (work on building physically heavy) and now winter: I will be needs warm clothes (boots, trousers, a jacket, a cap), and to buy me all this there is nothing.

I see an exit only somewhere to find money, to be restored and begin to earn. Without work there is no future.

And in general, I would like to become the programmer and to go to the USA. But in my case, hardly it will come true. And young people should study and have to left, but not in 27 years …

I don't see a further exit at all.

I ask you if you can help, at least on food, 1 or 5 or 10 dollars which will be enough for me for 2-3 weeks to live a little more, help please!

And so there is no wish to die, the world is not Russia, and in the world there is a lot of all fine: beautiful places, wonderful and kind people, surprising animals, huge seas and oceans, high mountains ….

I wrote with despair here.... will disconnect the Internet and energy for failure to pay soon....

once I had everything: both my favourite close people, and money, and business, but I lost everything. I am a loser. For that I didn't undertake - nothing is impossible. I ask you, give me please, one more chance, and don't allow me to die of hunger.

Thank you that read. Let the Lord will bless you! Long years to you!

Yours faithfully, Dmitry.