I was trying to help myself

My name is Tomasz and I am a transgender person.

I had two operations (mastectomy and hysterectomy). With one I had complications and I had another surgery that saved me.

For many years I tried to hide all these dysphoric thoughts. Still - I can't always do it, and I can't fully enjoy life. The greatest dysphoria, however, is the lack of male genitalia, and this is - unfortunately - the most expensive surgery for which I am not able to collect the money on my own.

I have problems with interpersonal relationships due to shame and an insufficiently masculine feeling.

I live in Poland, where the LGBT situation is not positive. We are attacked more and more often - both physical and, above all, mental. In the end, the president himself said that we are not human.

Due to the recent situation in Poland, everything has intensified - it's hard for me to hear from a man's yew about the fact that I am an animal, a woman and that I should be killed - from a man who can start a family, who has no problem with his body, can function normally.

Once upon a time I was full of life, I wrote a novel, I dreamed and dreamed of traveling, but now, it's all gray and dark.

I can no longer support it when I know that I am barely able to survive and that I am not putting money aside for surgery.

I have been collecting money for my mastectomy for 5 years.

5 long years in which I denied myself everything and looked at the artificial phone screen to see how my loved ones lived their lives to the full.

I would like him to feel fully a man.

I set up rewards on a fundraiser because I would like to repay somehow.

Thank you for your time and support.

If anyone would like to contact me, here is my e-mail: [email protected]