i want to feel happy

hi....thanks for reading and i know this may seem foolish of me to ask money for this...but i have to try! you see in my family we have many problems and the pandemic thing didnt help .....so im feeling really depressed and i want to draw (digitally ) but its expensive and all the money we have its for more important things like food living expenses and all of that.....drawing makes me happy but in this country all of that is expensive even paper ......thanks for read !