I just need help to get me thru a month or two…

My name is Jose Mari Mallari

2017 - I lost my beloved wife

2018 - Since she does handle a lot of our finances, all I did was work, give her my pay , take a few bucks for those weekend family meal surprises. Now that she is gone, I don't know how the hell she managed everything. Did everything on my own, sought help as well a few times on how to manage.

Last December I was asked to resign from my job, they said I wasn't the same anymore and its affecting work, well yeah go figure, I lost my wife who was everything to me, she made me who I am today. From someone who thrashes a place just because the paint was wrong,did a lot of stuff that I am not proud of to someone who is hopefully a decent person now.

I did get hired for 2 more work from home jobs, but the pay wouldnt arrive until February...started last week in an effort that working from home will reduce my expenses.The money stopped altogether, no savings no nothing, bills are piling up.

I managed to get a few loans from cash apps for our country just to get by with the bills, I need to pay them in order to continue working. Ive been eating nothing but crackers since December to conserve the last paycheck I got. I am in the brink of loosing my home...I wouldn't really mind going homeless, if I was alone but I have a seven year old kid.

Now I am really empty, I cant think straight anymore,I don't know what to do,I just would like the world to standstill for a moment......I dont know what else to do.........