I am a 46 year old loving mother of two beautiful young ladies. I am a daughter, a sister, a wife and an aunt. I have a lot of loving friends and family. I have a great sense of humor and never fail to make someone smile. I love nature and supporting my kids and family wherever I can. I am a hard worker and put 150% into everything I do. I recently moved to KZN. A week ago, I was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. 46?? All my dreams, all my aspirations, just gone. I'm scared, I'm scared for my kids, my husband and my mom. I fear leaving my loved ones behind and not being able to do everything i can to still support and love them. The most difficult concept to accept is that this isn't my fault and that I didn't do this to them. I know it isnt but it's how I feel. I watch their pain and blame myself, I watch how they care for me relentlessly and I blame myself for taking their time, their energy. I fail to comprehend it all. I am currently in a lot of pain and I get tired very quickly, but my family and friends are giving me the strength to fight this cancer! I still have a lot to teach my kids and a lifetime of love to give everyone around me.
I have a lot of faith that God will put his healing hands on me and that my family and with the support of everyone around me, I am and will fight to live.
I am currently on pain medication to manage my pain in order to get much needed rest, both for me and my family who are constantly taking care of me 24 hours a day. I will start chemotherapy. All funds raised will go towards paying for my chemo, medication and regular blood tests to keep track of the tumour growth. I have no medical aid and I will have to make regular visits to my oncologist.
I must fight this cancer, I must have more time with my family, I can't accept that this is the end for me. I know my place in this world, I know where I fit in, in these people's lives, I cannot give up. I cannot accept that I am no longer able to support my kids, my husband, my mom.
I taught my girls to be beautiful, strong, independent young woman, but I never, ever thought to teach them to live without me, especially just as they've stared their own lives.
Any donations would be greatly appreciated, as mentioned, this will go towards all my treatment and journey to life.