I have found myself in a horrible situation and am struggling to know what to do next. I have just escaped a horrifically violent and abusive relationship but am struggling (due to lack of finances and my ex's manipulation of the whole situation) to escape completely. As well as leaving me financially destitute, he has caused me injuries that require private medical attention that I cannot afford. (I have been told that NHS waiting lists are too long.)
He systematically cut me off from my friends and family, took control of my finances and beat me if I tried to complain. He used to slap me, pin me to the bed by kneeling on my arms and then waterboard me (pour water over my face). He split my lips, bruised my eyes and face and my arms and body were always covered in purple and black bruises. One day he hit me around the head so hard that he gave me concussion and perforated my eardrum. He refused to let me go get treatment and as a result I am suffering 60% hearing loss and constant pain in that ear (6 months later). The doctor told me it doesnt qualify as an emergency case now so I face a 3-4 month waiting list to see a specialist which will risk it getting worse and the damage increasing, becoming more permenant. I cannot rd the bills to go privately. I play the piano and sing and not being able to hear properly is devastating to me.
One night, the neighbours called the police because they were sick of hearing my screams every night. The police came and have removed him from the property. He still hassles me by text and phone and comes to the house whenever he wants. He still has a key and I lie awake terrified that he will come in the night and beat me again. I cannot even leave the house without looking over my shoulder and worrying perhaps I bump into him. It is ruining my life.
I found a flat to move to, far away where he will not be able to find me. The problem is that the landlord of my current flat will only give me my deposit (that I paid all of) back to me if he gives permission as well (as his name is still on the contract). My ex is refusing to let me have the money because he does not want me to leave. Where I am now he knows where I live, he has a key, he is still controlling me. I have to pay the deposit on the new flat by Monday next week and I am panicking. I do not know what to do.
My parents are pensioners and cannot help, my father is terminally ill and my mother has heart problems. I pay their rent as well out of my wages and support them financially. This is why I started this appeal, to ask for help. Without it I cannot leave the house I am in and my ex will still be controlling me and making me live in fear. Without it I cannot afford to have my hearing loss treated privately and I risk losing more hearing or it becoming permenant, not to mention living in pain daily. Without it I cannot afford to support my parents this month with their rent.
I do not know what to do and I am at my wits end.