I am currently in personal debt due to course funding/mortgage payments and household bills.
My absolute dream is to start a family. I had what I would call a very lonely childhood where I only had a few adults around me and no children to talk to of my own age, no family members who could come over and keep me company and with this paired with the separation of my parents at a young age, I have been left with very bad childhood memories and events that I would like to be able to forget and put behind me.
I am struggling to do this as I think about it every day, and I dream of how I can give myself a better future and start a family to create amazing memories. You will know if you have children, the joy of having your baby and bringing them up with good experiences and memories. I am yet to experience this but it is something I think about every day. I have worked every working day full time ever since I left school 7 years ago and I have always earned my own money, paid my bills on time and not complained however I am unable to get a permanent job where I work and just cannot bare the thought of worrying for years and years on end about how I can get a secure job to pay all of my bills.
I have been going through a very difficult time for the last 4 -5 months, something I have shared only with my partner. I've been depressed and lonely and no matter how much I have tried to make every part of my life happier, I just can't seem to get there.
What I want more than anything is to start a family and be the best mum to my children, I see all of my friends around me getting married and having children and I feel happy for them, but sad that I cannot join them for now.
I am applying for part time jobs left, right and centre to try and earn extra money to clear my debts so that I can begin to plan a future but I am having no luck. I would be so,so grateful if anyone could help me towards paying my debts off so that when I earn my money, I can actually put it aside to reach this happy future I dream of instead of feeling like I'm working myself into an even lonelier world.
If anyone has the same dreams as me to have a healthy future and happy family, or if you already have this and wish it upon others, please do help me and maybe one day I will be able to help others do the same.