Me and my daughter have been separated for just over 2 years now from my wife who is a citizen of and currently resides in South Korea.
We were previously living together in Dubai but could no longer afford the cost of living there as being able to employ and sponsor a nanny for our daughter was no longer affordable especially since we frequently had to change nannies because they either didn't show up for days or were abusive towards our 3 year old daughter. The nature of our jobs also had us out of the country for up to 3 days every 2 weeks in which we would be deeply worried and scared for our daughters safety while we are in another country and she's alone in the care of someone who is ultimately a stranger.
Me and my wife decided that me and my daughter would return to Cape Town where we would have support of family members and not strangers while my wife remained in Dubai to serve out her contract and I would find a job in Cape Town and my wife would join us here eventually.
Since arriving in SA 2 years ago, I have since not been able to find employment and had to rely on my wife to send money every month and she also visited us several times but each trip here she could only spend 1 week with us. Then, the world eventually entered lock down with travel bans and its been more than a year now that we have not enjoyed the physical presence of each other.
My wife suffered from loneliness, anxiety and depression as she was alone in Dubai and locked down in a studio apartment everyday. My daughter also suffered as her mother's absence affected her emotionally and mentally, she was still happy as I also tried my best to play the role of both mom and dad but is becoming more and more withdrawn as time goes by, and it becomes evident that a mother can never be replaced and should never be separated from their child. My wife missed her 5th birthday last year, and Ive never seen my daughter as sad as she was that day without her mom on her birthday.
My wife completed her contract and had to return to Korea as SA had travel bans at the time. She lives with her Grand mother whom she also takes care of. But our daughter also needs to be given that care from her mom. The only contact we have is via video calls and there are times our daughter avoids those calls because it hurts her that she can only see mommy on video and can't play with her or hug and hold her.
All of us are suffering emotionally and mentally, and a 5 year old should not be enduring this kind of anguish knowing mommy is there but also not there. Whenever my wife visited and came the time to leave again, my daughter relived the pain and heartache of watching her mom leave and not knowing when she would come back. Its too much that she won't sleep in her own bed every night and sleeps with me to make sure that I don't go away too.
Me and daughter live with my dad who was forced to retire and his wife's salary has been cut by 2 thirds since the Covid pandemic, and thats all we have to get by with and the R350 Covid grant which I collected every month.
I have been unemployed for these last 2 years and am beyond frustration, sadness and anxiety about our future, especially my daughter. I thus have recently sold my possessions to pay for a TEFL course so that I can get a job as a English teacher in South Korea as unemployment in SA is rife and getting worse and I stand a much better chance at finding a job in Korea and my family can be together once more.
I have had all my documents that are needed for obtaining a visa, apostilled and authenticated, as legally required by a very good legal team, which I must say, charged me the best and fairest price for their services in comparison to other firms offering the same service. This helped a lot in stretching what funds I had available, and afforded me the opportunity to purchase mine and my daughters flight tickets to South Korea while they were still cheap. That money is now spent after purchasing the flight tickets and buying groceries and other essentials we needed to lighten the financial burden on my dads wife.
Now the reason for requesting funds is because, as a South African citizen, I need to do chest X-rays as part of the visa application (My daughter has dual citizenship, so she does not need to do the X-rays) and also pay for Covid 19 tests to be allowed to travel to and enter South Korea and to tide us over during the first 1 to 2 months in Korea before earning my first salary. Ultimately, the funds would help us to start over again and start picking up the pieces putting our lives back together again - permanently.
Although my wife lives with her Grandmother, we will get our own place and slowly add the things the house will need to make our new place our home once more. 2 years has been torture for my wife and daughter being apart so as dad and husband, I have to reunite us in any way that holds possibility and I hope that you can help me do that. The smallest donation is piece of our lives being put back together again and fills the gap between my wife and daughter.
I just want to see them happy once more, have my wife read bedtime stories, do our daughters hair, paint and draw together and all other things my wife misses out on, but especially important, is that my wife does not miss our daughters birthday this year but to be there with her to celebrate it, I don't want to fail them on this one, and humbly and desperately I say to those listening that I'm in need of all the help I can get as I am not able to do this alone.