Help a depressed desperate man

I wanna move abroad, to USA or Canada in particular, and try to build a new life, in a new place, with new people, and HOPEFULLY... New me.

I graduated from Libraries and documents department, faculty of Arts, Cairo University. I have been diagnosed with depression and social phobia since the year 1999/2000, but I have actually been depressed way before that, it's just that this was the time I started attending University, and the time that my parents started to notice my depressive and suicidal thoughts.

I graduated in 2007, with the least passable grade: Pass, and didn't really make real advancements career wise, or social-life wise. I worked after my graduation in a small company owned by one of my relatives, but left after a few months, as I gained no real experience and it was very low paying, and also because it involved me making/answer phone calls and Skype calls, and I used to get stressed and stutter sometimes, which made me extremely embarrassed and afraid.

I then tried about 3 other jobs that didn't last long, until I found my most noticeable and valuable work experience, as an archivist and web/photo editor in an Egyptian Newspaper. But I didn't continue all that time in this last job, as I quit in 2015, after more than 5 years of working there, mostly because people there were either nervous or intrusive or annoying or used to always make fun of me (Some of them, not all).

I started a training period in a small translation and publishing and e-learning company, and than I started to work and have a salary, but the company was financially unstable, and they kept giving me endless work, web researching and text editing and translation and typing, which gradually caused me to be stressed and demotivated, as i couldn't keep making good progress in all these tasks, and I ended up leaving this company after about 2 years.

Now... I am trying to do freelance work, but I became extremely depressed and demotivated, more than any other time in my life, and i am continuing to live life passionlessly. Now I hate my life and my house and my room and myself and my mom (whom I am living with), I feel like all the memories of all my failure and negative emotions in my past life is suffocating me or putting me in chains, or draining life out of my body.

I WANNA LEAVE... I want to go away from here (Cairo, Egypt)... I want to have an adventure that makes me feel alive again, I wanna see a whole new place with new people and new possibilities, and no evidence or traces to my life failure.

Unfortunately, as a citizen of a Muslim Arab Middle Easter/North African third world country, which is Egypt, getting to any of these places isn't really easy at all, specially that my Academic and professional merit is below average. I can't get a job offer to use it to get the work permit and the worker visa, probably my only option for working visa is by taking unskilled work, like room service or cleaning jobs, which is not very appealing but I am actually considering it, and searching for any such opportunity.

My other options are landing a traineeship, or by Academic study. I am probably eligible to apply for a J-1 Vise traineeship program, but first I have to find a host company and a sponsor, which I can't do it on my own, nothing really works out. Recently, I contacted Prof. Newton Lee, president of Institute for Education, Research, and Scholarships, he offered me the service of searching for a host company for me, but it will cost up to 2750 dollars. So, one of the ways that the money from my campaign will be spent is for this purpose: Assisting me to get a traineeship offer and get sponsored and get help acquiring my visa and finding accommodation. There is also another way, which is enrolling in a associate degree or a professional diploma, which will probably cost more than my campaign target (3000 $), but this is not my primary objective... The traineeship is. I am also trying to get any H-2A/B Visa-Sponsored job, but even this I have not been able to do it yet.

Remember... My goal is to move temp/perm to the countries mentioned before... So, if you can actually help by anything else other than money, like offering me a job or referring me to some kind of agency or institution or company, this will also be great.