Heading: Life threw me with lemons. 😢
Life has been a mess for me since 2018 , but escalated till now.
Here is my story:
In 2018 i was diagnosed with Rheamatoid Artritis and placed on several medications. Yes i have medical aid and yes they pay "most of it". As time progressed and more tests were done, they now added more medication, because of iron deficiancy in the blood and shortage of blood and vitamin D in the blood stream and cholestrol. Medical aid does not cover these medication and i have to pay R900 per month for it, as it is chronic.
Then came 2019 and from here my whole life went south. My dad whom was my pillar, my rock and my go to person suddenly passed away. O boy i take and took this very hard.
But then came August 2020, now this wripped life from out under me and till present i struggle with this. I cry, i dont sleep and even lost 15kg so far bacause of it.
A day after our (my husband and my) anniversary my husband whom i would take a bullet for any night or day and whom i place on a pedistal, broke the news to me and our 2 kids aged 12 and 13 at the time, that he was having an affair during lockdown with a younger girl (17 years old at the time). Yip believe it or not. The affair was ended a week before he told me. Now ouch, that hit all the spots that could hurt and or break.
Being the type of person i am, i gave him 10 points for telling me him self and for coming clean, because i believe love concurs all and because i love him so dearly and because he is the father of our children, i decided to forgive him and to give him a second chance. He even agreed to marriage counsaling, which is unlike him, but non the less he agreed and i got to say my piece to the girl.
Then one day not long after my husband told me, a person whom knows me and him well via work, informed me that my husband is planning on running away with this girl as they are suspecting her being pregnant. The plan apparently was that they will wait till i am at work, take all furniture etc and run away together.
I kept it to myself that i was informed about this. So what i then did was the following. I had a credit card that was meant to be used to pay both our childrens school fees through out the year and for emergency use. So i maxed the card out and send the funds to my mom to buy furniture and what ever else me and our kids would need, should he follow through with their plan.
A month later when he still did not run, i confronted him about it, he was honest, he admitted that they thought she was pregnant and merely discussed running away together while they were still seeing each other. It later came out she used someone elses sonar picture to lie to him and say that she is pregnant (which she is not), he then broke it off telling her that he would never leave his wife and or kids for her.
Now this now was a huge problem. Now i maxed out my card for nothing. When i maxed out my card obviously the monthly repayment went sky high compare to what it was. The limit of the card is R73 000 and monthly repayment is R3900, compare to the R600.00 it use to be.
I did not want to tell him, because 1 no matter how bad he hurt me, he is a fantastic father and one does not play with money ment for his kids. Remember i said the funds was meant to pay for their school fees. So i started falling behind on their school fees, our rent etc, because of the high re payment on the card. When petrol etc was needed, which i normally got from the card, i now had to start begging for money just so that i could provide what was needed, in order for him not to know.
I approached someone in our family and asked for assistance and confided and trusted that person. The person promised to assist with a loan in order to pay the card and also to keep it secret. But the person never kept it secret and told my husband brother, whom then told my husband.
He was beyond angry. So now with me falling behind on our rent and debt, it forced him to take out a loan to make up for some of the debt and rent i fell behind on. Out of fear of losing my husband, i even turned to Lottostar and hoped for the best, to no avail.
So now with me having to pay back the card, him having to pay back the loan, it took all we had to survive monthly. So he maxed out his credit card in order for us to have food, petrol, electricity.
Now all is maxed out, a huge amount of debt is on the table. We pay what we have to monthly, but after paying all that needs to be paid, there is simply no funds left for food, electricity and petrol.
I just could not handle everything on my plate and at one stage wanted to end my life, but then decided i have kids and need to get myself together and therefor seeked help.
For the last month we have been eating at my in-laws. And this month will be the same and the next and the next. For 69 months. This is no life for us as a family.
So i decided to poor my heart out and ask for your help. Please somewhere i need a break, a light at the end of the tunnel.