Gender change and living life without fear

I want to raise money for a sexual transformation. I have suffered so much since I was 15 years old. So far, there have been community and family restrictions, suicide attempts, psychological pressure and I can't take it anymore. I just don't want to do this any more. I'm no longer a puppet. Community and family-driven and what It appears to them from me physically I hope whoever sees those words help me out of those looks full of hurting and damaging me help me escape from the ghost caught me just because they don't believe what I'm going through.