Crushing debt – Help save marriage

I am female, 42,  in great debt, and need help.   I was a stock trader until 9/11/01. Lost my job, lost everything. Took 9 months to find a job, and the debt grew, and grew and grew.  Had to take a job that payed half of what i was making.  Making minimum payments has left me in debt for years, and no closer to free.  Please help me get out of this debt.    I have now reached the point where my salary doesnt cover my payments, I applied for a loan to reconsolidate and see an end in sight, but i was turned down.  please help me have a chance to be debt free in this lifetime. thank you for your kindness.    I am too embarassed to put up a picture, so I am sure that hurts my chances of being helped, but i hope it doesnt matter if i am ugly or beautiful, to be deserving of help.  thank you for reading