June 30, I rushed Mama at the ER (emergency room) because of her cellulitis and hypertension. Her BP (blood pressure) was 180-200, so she was admitted and brought to her room. I texted/informed all persons concerned and I left her at about 11:00 pm that night. The next day, as I was going to bathe her I asked if she ate or slept well but she answered me with a slurry voice.On my way to the elevator I saw the JCON (Junior Consultant) who admitted her at the ER and told the JCON if why Mama had a slurry voice. The JCON rushed to mama's room and told me that mama will be transferred to ICU (intensive care unit) because it is a STROKE already. From that very minute I heard that "word", numbness started to overpower my body. Never comes in my mind that it will happen to Mama or to us. Based from the result of her CT scan (I will just explain it in a simple way we can all understand) she had an infarct on the left part of the cerebral part of her brain, causing her brain to swell and is hitting the main system that is responsible for breath, speech and balance. 9:30am, July 1, mama was put at the ICU after her CT scan. She was still okay, she can talk with a slurry voice (salita sya ng salita ang daldal may mga binabangit syang mga pangalan), she can still grip my hands, and she can still follow instructions. And then I thought everything will be ok because she’s being taken care of. 10:00pm I was awakened by ICU nurse because mama will have to be intubated because of shortness of breath. “Sa oras na yun nagsimula mawasak ang mga parte ng katawan ko kasabay ng sakanya”. I will never forget those words the Doctor told me “Jonah if she’s brain dead I will suggest you to let her go” ngayon ko naramdaman kung gano kabigat intindihin ang simpleng salitang ito napakabigat. Then her cardiologist asked me if I want to consult a neuro-surgeon and then they offered me surgery, all possible relatives/family was asked for their approval and then the majority says “NO” because of the possibility that mama won’t make it at the “TABLE” which is sinigundahan naman ng kanyang Neurologist and Anesthesiologist. Her body started to deteriorate unti-unti, 20% chances…15% chances hanggang she became comatose. Prayers lang ang kinapitan ko, everyday negative ang status ni mama “GCS 3” nalangang score nya meaning kahit sa pain hindi na sya nagrereact hanggang sa kahit ako suntukin ako ng araw na yon hindi ko narin mararamdaman. 10:00am July 3, The Internal Medicine JCON told me “Jonah gumalaw ang mata ng mama mo” (which is a good sign) then unti-unti everyday she always surprise us (including the doctors) of her little by little miracles. Mama undergo tracheostomy para maiwasan ang infection pagmatagalnaka-intubate. Until on her 2nd week her endocrinologist and pulmonologist told me that mama has little chances na ma-WIN sakanyang ventilator meaning matagal-tagal na nakakabit si mama sa ventilator para syang huminga para kay mama. The pulmonologist even showed me as she removed the tube connecting mama from the ventilator and said “Tingnan mo wala syang sariling hinga”, nakita ko rin talaga wala,sab iko sa saril iko eto nanaman. When the Doctor left (pulmonologist) the nurse tried to decrease the oxygen released by the ventilator and observe if mama can tolerate it, and then another miracle happened, biglang huminga si mama hanggang sa na-WIN na sya sa ventilator at oxygen mask nalang sa “trake” (yung tube nanakalabassabutasnyasalalamunan). Now mama has facial expressions like nasasaktan, umiiyak, sumisinok, umuubo, lumulunok kaya langhindiparinnagigisingsabing doctor matatagalan pa. Gusto kong masabayan si mama sakanyang paglaban pero nasasaktan akong isipin na baka hindi ko maibigay ng pangmatagalan ang mga pangangailangan nya ng maayos. Mataas ang chance ni mama namagka-pneumonia, UTI, pagbaba ng hemoglobin (nakadalawang blood transfusion na kami), diabetes, bedsore. Kailangan ko ng continuous supply ng gloves, suction tube, diaper, underpad, syringes, lahat ng gamot nya. Next week pwede naraw kamin glumabas sa hospital pero baka hindi kami makalabas kasi kailangan ng ICU set-up sa bahay. Kailangan ko ng hospital bed, suction machine, glucometer, blood pressure apparatus, Oxygen tank with regulator. Kailangan ko rin isettle ang bill namin na sangayon umabot na ng 800,000.00,wala pa ang mga PF (Professional Fee) ng mga doctor nya, kahit lahat ng politiko at departamento sa gobyerno at bawasin pa po ang philhealth at senior sa bill namin malaki parin po ang matitira. Habang ginagawa ko itong sulat na to tumutulo ang luha ko sa paanong paraan ko ipoprovide ang lahat ng ito kilala nyo naman po ang pamilya ko. Kayo po ang last option ko hindi ko po talaga kaya to ng magisa sana matulungan nyo ako. “Ako ay unti-unti ng sumusuko pero si Mama unti-unti paring lumalaban”. Maawa po sana kayo kay mama. Thank you. God bless us all.